- The Writer – Lester Lewis
- Director – Stephen Merchant
- A brief synopsis – All the sales folks get great customer service results except for Jim and Dwight, who also, strangely, do not have the coffee cups that everyone else at the branch has. Michael, upon seeing the results, decides that they need counselling on sales approach. Pam and Jim have found a new way to communicate via tiny Bluetooth devices. Angela corners Andy into scheduling the wedding at Schrute farms.
- The best line –Michael: Here’s what’s going to happen. I am going to have to fix you, manage you two on a more personal scale, a more micro form of management. Jim, what is that called?
Michael: Boom! Yes. Now, Jim is going to be the client. Dwight, you’re going to have to sell to him without being aggressive, hostile or difficult. Let’s go.
Dwight: All right, fine. [picks up phone] Brrring.
Jim: [picks up phone] Hello?
Dwight: Hello, this is Dwight Schrute from the Dunder Mifflin Paper Company.
Jim: Wow, that’s great, because I need paper.
Dwight: Excellent, then you are in luck, because we are having a limited-time offer only on everything.
Jim: Wow, this is my lucky day.
Michael: [whispers] Ask him his name.
Dwight: What is your name, sir?
Jim: I am Bill Buttlicker.
Dwight: Really, that’s your real name?
Jim: How dare you? My family built this country, by the way.
Michael: Be respectful, Dwight.
Dwight: Yes, Michael.
Jim: Would you hold on one second? That’s my other line.
Dwight: What? No, but I —
Jim: Hello? [laughs] No, I’m just on the phone with this stupid salesman. He’s so dumb. Probably just gonna keep him on the line forever and not buy anything. Yeah, OK. [punches button on phone]
Michael: It’s up to you to change his mind.
Jim: Sorry. That was a family emergency.
Dwight: Oh, no. What’s wrong?
Jim: You know what? That’s private.
Michael: Boundaries, Dwight. Come on!
Dwight: Sorry, Mr. Buttlicker. As I was saying, we’re having a limited–
Jim: Sorry, you’re going to have to speak up a little bit louder. I’m hard of hearing.
Michael: He’s hard of — he’s an old man. Let’s go.
Dwight: OK, as I was saying, right now we are having —
Jim: You’re gonna have to talk louder.
Dwight: OK, our prices have never been lower.
Jim: Son, you have to talk louder.
Dwight: …never been lower!
Jim: Louder, son!
Dwight: [shouting] Buttlicker! Our prices have never been lower!
Michael: Stop it! Stop it!
Dwight: He —
Michael: That is totally inappropriate. You never yell at the client. You never yell at the client.
Jim: Now, you listen to me, sir.
Michael: Here we go.
Jim: The three words I would describe you as is aggressive, hostile and definitely difficult.
Michael: Give me the phone.
Dwight: Please, Mr. Buttlicker —
Jim: I’m irate right now.
Michael: Give me the phone.
Dwight: Please give me another chance. Mr. Buttlicker.
Michael: Give me the phone. Give me the phone.
Dwight: I have to put you on with my boss.
Jim: Well, I should hope so. [Michael takes phone] Who is this?
Michael: Hello, this is Michael Scott, regional manager.
Jim: Well, this is William M. Buttlicker.
Michael: Hello, Mr. Buttlicker. How may we help you?
Jim: Michael, I like the sound of your voice. You know what I’m going to do? I’m going to buy one million dollars worth of paper products today.
Dwight: [shakes fist, whispers] Yeah!
Michael: [covers phone, whispers to Dwight] See how it’s done? [into phone] Thank you very much, sir. I don’t think you’ll regret it. [to Dwight] See what I did?
Dwight: You are the master.
Jim: There is one condition, Michael.
Jim: You have to fire the salesman that treated me so terribly.
Dwight: Don’t do it, Michael.
Michael: … [whispers] It’s a million-dollar sale.
- The best moment – Michael pretending to reprimand Kelly while Dwight and Jim look on.
- The best storyline – Kelly’s revenge is wonderfully typical Kelly behavior.
- Notable guest appearance – Alex shows up as someone truly dedicated to Pam getting the most out of New York.
- Would Michael have been reprimanded? – Anywhere but in Officeland, Kelly’s plot would have serious consequences.
- Grade – A-
This is a good episode as a showcase for Kelly. Jim and Pam’s excursion to New York has about played out, but has been an agonizingly good ride. Speaking of agonizing, Andy is in for it within the Angela and Dwight vise grip. Nice to have Michael not front and center, for a change.